Lately, I have noticed that social media has been awash with conversations about “not lowering your standards”.
People fuss about having high standards rather than prioritising stagnation over moving forward.
With all this talk on social media, we find most people alluding to lowering their standards in career, relationship and other facets of life.
The question though is who is lying to who?
Are people genuinely not lowering their standards in real life?
Are they always going for their ultimate high goals or demands from life and choosing to live a lie on social media?
Chuka always wanted to date women who had to go through particular academic accomplishments. He met Doyin who set his soul on fire but learnt that she was a recent graduate and yet to go for her National Youth Service.
Should Chuka lower his standard and consider that he might not soon find someone who understands him like Doyin soon.
What would you do if you were in his shoes?
I believe it is vital that we invest and test situations to know the reality that is best suited for our context.
According to Jennifer Louden, “Lowering your standards means removing the dead weight of perfectionism, of standards so impossibly high you never meet them. Lowering your standards is remembering that to be human means to be flawed”.
I believe that lowering your standard can be a smart thing to do. It is not always toxic but can be a strategy to set you on the path to reach the goals you have set, rather than being stagnated by them.
Let us look at questions to ask yourself to know when to lower those standards and still be on course with your goals.
Lowering or Not Lowering Your Standards: 5 Must-Ask Questions
- Does your standard exist?
- Are you enforcing your standards too soon?
- Are you giving the chance to discover if its good for you, or takes you to the next level?
- What are the things most important to you now/future?
- Does it take you off your trajectory?
Let me state here that judging people too quickly makes you unkind.
If people show you who they are, believe them, but ask yourself, are they in their best place doing this? Have I communicated or demanded better from the situation.
Also, realise that this is not the same for making excuses for a flawed character.
Compromise sometimes to understand the situation before committing to the experience. Sometimes, lowering your standards can put you on a better trajectory of happiness and achieve your goals.
I took 23 minutes to deep dive into lowering your standards or not lowering your standards and how it affects your goals. Watch the session on Instagram below…